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Whether you plan to own your house long-term, want to fix up a dump and sell it for big bucks or are just looking for a little change in your surroundings, knowing what to improve, what to gut and where to start are always challenging decisions. It is best to examine every room in the house and address either the area you frequent the most or the one that has forced your hand (How much longer can you wash the dishes in the bathtub?). The first two things you need to consider are your budget and timeline.

Maybe a home-office would cut down your commuting time and therefore vastly improve your quality of life. Perhaps with an updated kitchen or family room you’d actually entertain. Maybe you’re an outdoorsman who cringes every time you set foot on your Astroturf-covered back patio or a do-it-yourselfer who’s finally ready to turn one corner of your overstuffed garage into a workshop. Whatever your circumstances, make a list and start to prioritize.

If you are not the sole decision maker in your home, talk with your partner or spouse to find out what they would like to upgrade first. You have to set some goals together. You may be surprised to learn that your wife loves the cold terracotta tile in the kitchen but will leave you if you insist that the dated “stone” around the 70’s fireplace is retro chic. You may also discover that while you fantasize of creating a “media room” replete with a plasma TV suspended in mid-air, invisible bookshelves and a universal remote control that massages your feet (somehow), your partner intuitively knows you should probably fix the leak in your bedroom ceiling first.

Once you can agree on a project that fits your budget and timeline that will also enhance your lifestyle and the value of your home, get proactive about starting it and completing it. Whether you are talking about changing the paint color in the kids’ rooms or adding an entire new wing to the house, the biggest source of conflict and turmoil results from lack of planning and an inability to manage your expectations – of each other and the folks you may hire to get the work done.

Just as an example, let’s say you’ve agreed to expand and update the master bathroom, partially because your real estate agent has informed you that you’ll see a 127.5% return on your money when you sell (and believe me, he wants you to sell), and partially because your water bill has tripled since the tub spout sprung that nasty leak (the one you’ve been neglecting for 6 months). By fixing it now, you actually get to enjoy the fruits of your labor—as long as you’re not forced to sell once the work is complete because you spent tens of thousands of dollars you don’t have and can’t afford to borrow indefinitely (see where I’m going with the poor planning thing?).

EXPECTATION: We’ll buy tile when we need it – it will be in stock, there will be a lot to choose from and it won’t be that expensive. We are still in the framing phase of the job, let’s not get too hasty and spend the money now on tile, a toilet, the tub, sinks – we get all of that later.

REALITY: You are already paying for change orders out the wahzoo and your timeline just doubled. As soon as you decide to remodel the master bath, start ripping out pictures from magazines that you like and start sourcing all of the items you will need. Once you find them, purchase them and get them on site. A great way to research the costs and comparison shop is to use the Internet.

HOT TIP: To save on both material and labor costs, measure your backsplash space based on installing full tiles (If you’re using three inch tiles, plan to go six or nine inches high, not eight, etc.) and make sure your plugs are either below or above where the backsplash stops.
EXPECTATION: We’ll find a reliable contractor who can start on Monday and he will come in under budget and on time! He will take care of everything and I can tune out for the next two months while the work gets completed.

REALITY: That guy (or gal) doesn’t exist and if he or she does, you are not going to end up with the bathroom of your dreams but rather the vision of some hammer-wielding Neanderthal who enjoys spending other people’s money. Get at least three referrals (your real estate agent may be a good source for names) and then check out the status of their license, go look at their work and talk to their previous clients (they should have a list of references if they have maintained good relationships from previous work).

HOT TIP: Prepare a list of questions for your potential contractor. You are setting the tone for your work relationship from the first moment you meet, and you will get better service out of someone who perceives that you are prepared and know what to expect from your contractor.
EXPECTATION: I’m going to love everything about my final result. I saved for this project, I planned it out carefully and nothing can keep me from being ecstatic when I take my first bubble bath in decadent luxury.

REALITY: There will always be something you’re going to wish you had done differently. Even if everything looks perfect upon completion, the plumbing might spring a leak, the white grout may turn black, or the countertops might stain (Saying things like "Why did I let my contractor talk me into black honed granite?). Learn to roll with it and know that everything can be fixed…for a price.

HOT TIP: When you don’t know what finish to choose, always get a second opinion from a professional in that field. For example, a counter top expert will know what sealer to apply to your new stone slabs—and will remind you that it is your job to reseal them in six months in order to protect your investment for years to come.